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Don't Be A Monster

by Ru Mundy

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joeboon I can't write enough to convey what Ruth's songs mean to me. I am processing the grief of the past and the hope I have for the future through repeat listening. It's like floating atop a pool of emotion hand in hand with a dear friend. Favorite track: Old Love.
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1.
I listen to Leonard Cohen on the tube so everything's imbued with significance He says "everybody knows the fight was fixed, The poor stay poor and the rich get rich", while I'm walking through everybody else's scenes and I'm seen for who I dream I could be to all the ones in Doc Martens or reading The Guardian or wearing their socialist hats, and I'm falling in love, with all the above, because there's something of you in their eyes. But I'm harbouring murderous thoughts for the ones who I guess voted Tory God forgive them they know not what they do they're too brainwashed or selfish to find out the truth So the words five more years can reduce me to tears and I'm paralysed with fears for my kids they're not rich, they're not men, they're not straight, they're not white They won't just 'be alright, in the end'. So I listen to Billy Bragg on the tube so everything's imbued with hope 'cos he's mixing pop and politics and they ask him what the use is and he offers them embarrassment and his usual excuses says you can sleep in with the sleepers or be active with the activists while we're waiting for the great leap forwards. But I'm still harbouring murderous thoughts for the Ones who I know voted Tory I'll forgive them, after they're gone and we've righted these wrongs, when we've got back: Our hospitals, libraries, royal mail, national rail Child support, legal aid, fuck we've made a mess of this, So the words five more years, reduce me to tears, and I'm torn apart by fears, for my kids. But you say, "dry your eyes, don't mourn, organise" And I do realise that you're right. So I listen to, owen jones on the tube, And everything's imbued with possibility.
2.
Lavinia 02:42
When I heard about you I was as happy as I've ever been. The first picture I saw of you Was the loveliest thing I've seen. You're already so stunning, I can't stop my mind from running away with me, On how you'll be. When you learn to smile, I'll spend a lifetime smiling back. And when you learn to talk, I'd walk for miles to hear you. I'll always have time for you, Whatever you need or want to do, I don't care what it is, I'm there. And sure, I hope that you'll grow up a feminist, A Marxist and and atheist too. But my love just as long as you think it all over, It's mostly up to you. I've got no advice for you, There's nothing you should or shouldn't do, Just take care, And know that I'm there.
3.
Owls 06:32
You, you dreamt about owls, trapped owls, who couldn't fly. While I, I dreamt about you wearing a red silk dress that reached to the ground you were spinning and twirling around and I opened the door and before I could speak, you practically flew out. So for me, pain's red, red silk, and it sounds like: "..." Then we, go outside, sit under the same sky that's been sat under by Jane Austen, Thomas Hardy, Napoleon and all his various guards and we talked, and we laughed, I shared the slightly scared contents of my mind only to find them reflected or accepted or both. So for me, happiness is black, black night, lit by stars. But why do they draw straight lines between the stars when there are more beautiful pictures to be found if only the lines were a little more round? If they joined the stars with curves, soft curves - well, if astronomers haven't the nerve, we'll invent our own constellations, call our innovations art, and we'll give them heart. And we'll learn to know the skies and we'll share synchronised cries of surprise when a star dies we'll say, "..." Then we go inside, say goodnight to the owls using a mixture of hoots and howls and they reply, "We, we're free, and we're alright, so you can sleep well tonight!" They say, "We, we're free, and we're alright, so sleep, well, tonight."
4.
Old Love 04:10
I've been walking round this town for days on end, And I depend, Heavily on you, and what you do for me. I think your friends could make amends, by getting lost once in a while, and I'd say I'll, I'd say I'll Do all the things they do for you, You could rely on me like I rely on you. I know I let you down before, But this time I'm sure: If it came to it, if it comes to it, I, I could die for you, I could die for you. I'm not saying that I couldn't live without you, Though I don't know how I would. And I'm not saying that I think you're perfect, But you're pretty damn good. I, I could die for you, I could die for you. I've been walking round this town for days on end, And I depend, Heavily on you, and what you do for me. I think your friends could make amends, by getting lost once in a while, and I'd say I'll, I'd say I'll Do all the things they do for you, You could rely on me like I rely on you. I know I let you down before, But this time I'm sure: If it came to it, if it comes to it, I, I would die for you, I would die for you. I'm not saying that I couldn't live without you, Though I don't know how I would. And I'm not saying that I think you're perfect, You're just pretty damn good. I, I would die for you, I would die for you.
5.
Station Yard 04:45
Let's go down to the station yard help me over the fence there's no pretence of being fine there's just your misery and mine. But I'm happier here than I ever am elsewhere, I swear, I swear, that in the backs of lorries and the fronts of cars on tanks, in cranes, in the middle of the yard, singing Cranberries songs about Kurt Cobain, it's an island of happiness in a sea of pain, anywhere with you would be the same. It's just that, here's good 'cos there's yards of razor wire and you're tall but the gates are higher: they keep everyone, everyone, everyone out. Except you, and me, and the owner but he only comes occasionally, and when he does we run and the adrenalin gets us higher, than the gates and the razor wire. We run back through the vicarage grounds, back through the village, ah we'll never be found, you with your combats cut off at the knee and me with my boots from the army, we're so well disguised I'd be surprised, if we're even visible, to the naked eye. Maybe that's why, you're so hard to find these days, we're running our separate ways, and I miss you. I thought the army stuff was ironic, I thought the protest songs were real, I thought us laughing on tanks was iconic, I thought our ethics were made of steel. 'Cos I know, I know, You've been to the places where I go. God knows, you've got the scars to show, that you know, you know. So let's go down to the station yard help me over the fence there's no pretence of being fine there's just your misery and mine. But I'm happier here than I ever am elsewhere, I swear, I swear.
6.
Lincoln 03:21
You were born with a broken heart, And that's a pretty tough start. And the shadows on your face, trace a map of all the crap that you've seen and been through, So when you sing my heart breaks too, My heart breaks. Hot damn, but your old man had heavy hands. And your mama's been blue, So long that you feel it too. You were born with a broken faith, And that's a pretty tough fate, It leaves you open to All kinds of sadness, hell, all kinds of madness but then all kinds of sanity too, all kinds of open-mindedness. Was that worth this? Hot damn, but your old man had heavy hands. And your mama's been blue, So long that you feel it too.

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released May 22, 2017

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Ru Mundy Wellington, New Zealand

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